Unmarried Couples: What You Need to Know About Unregistered Domestic Partnerships in Oregon

Are you breaking up with your partner? Do you disagree about how to split up your valuables, like cars or a home? Or maybe you're not sure what to do with your shared debts?

If this sounds like your situation and you live in Oregon, unregistered domestic partnership laws might apply to you.

What is an unregistered domestic partnership?

An unregistered domestic partnership is a legal relationship formed by living with someone and combining most aspects of your life. You don't need to sign legal documents to have this relationship.

If you are in one, you have the right to go to court when you break up. A judge can help divide the debts and property, such as cars, a home, and other belongings you got during your relationship.

How do I know if I have an unregistered domestic partnership?

There's no paperwork required to create this kind of partnership. Instead, it's based on how you and your partner handled your money and property while you were together.

You may be in an unregistered domestic partnership if you did most of these things:

• Combined bank accounts, investment accounts, or other financial accounts.
• Shared credit cards or took out loans together.
• Bought vehicles, a home, or other property together (regardless of whose name is on the ownership paperwork, like a deed or a title).
• Shared most of what you own, even if only one of you paid for it.
• Shared household income and expenses.
• Started a business together.
• Have children.
• Lived together as a couple.
• Acted like a married couple or told people you were married.

You can't know for sure that you have this relationship until you go to court. A judge will review evidence about how you combined your finances and lives and decide if unregistered domestic partnership laws apply.

The more you combine your finances and property, the more likely a judge will find you had an unregistered domestic partnership.

How does having this kind of relationship help us divide our stuff?

If you think you're in an unregistered domestic partnership, you can file a court case, called a dissolution of an unregistered domestic partnership. At the end of the court case, you'll get a decision from the court on who gets to keep what.

Should I go to court?

It depends on the value of the items you're fighting about. If you can't agree on how to divide up valuable property like your house, vehicles, or investments, then it may be a good idea.

Going to court can help in these specific situations:

• You stayed home to raise kids. A judge can help you get a fair share of things you and your partner bought while together (like cars or other valuable property), even if those things are only in your partner's name. This court case can be combined with a custody case so the judge can decide all issues together.
• You bought a house together and can't agree on what to do with it. If a judge finds that you had an unregistered domestic partnership, they can split the house fairly. This might involve ordering the house sold and splitting the proceeds, or one person keeping the house and buying out the other's share. This applies even if the house is only in one person's name.
• You're stuck with shared debt. A judge can order your ex to help pay off debt you took on together, even if it's only in your or your ex's name.
• Your ex controlled your finances or forced you into debt. A judge can help you divide everything fairly, order your ex to pay you money toward shared debts, or order your ex to give you a fair share of what you got during your relationship.

But court cases take time, they cost money, and they can be stressful. You should weigh the costs of going to court against the value of the property or debt you're fighting about.

What should I do next?

It is very difficult to handle this kind of case on your own. These cases are uncommon, and there are no free court forms available. Here's what we suggest:

Step 1: Consult with two or three attorneys

A lawyer can tell you if they think you were in an unregistered domestic partnership. You may get different opinions, so it's a good idea to contact more than one lawyer.

An easy way to find a lawyer is by contacting Oregon's Legal Referral Service. You can get referrals to up to three lawyers. The lawyers in this service agree to charge only $50 for an initial 30-minute meeting.

Step 2: Work with a mediator to try to settle outside of court

If a lawyer thinks you were in an unregistered domestic partnership, try working with a mediator first. A mediator is a neutral person who helps you and your ex talk through disagreements and find solutions, without deciding the outcome for you.

Benefits of mediation:

• Usually costs less than going through a contested court case.
• Often takes less time to resolve your disagreement.
• Both sides are usually happier with the outcome because they have a say in the final decision rather than leaving it up to a judge.

Learn more about mediators and how to find one in our article on mediation.

Step 3: Hire a lawyer if mediation doesn't work

You don't have to hire a lawyer for everything. To save money, you can ask a lawyer to help with part of your case, like preparing forms or giving advice. This is called unbundled legal services, or legal coaching.

How much does it cost?

Here are some costs you can expect:

• Initial consultation with a lawyer: You can expect to pay between $50 and $400 for an initial consultation. If you find a lawyer through Oregon’s Legal Referral Service, the initial consultation fee is capped at $50.
• Mediator: Mediation fees range from $100 to $400 per hour, with higher rates for lawyer mediators. The total cost depends on how many sessions you need and whether you hire the mediator to prepare your legal paperwork. You may pay between $5,000 and $10,000 for mediation. Most couples agree to split these fees.
• Additional legal fees if you can't settle in mediation: If you hire lawyers, expect to pay around $300 per hour. The total number of hours depends on the complexity of your case and the level of disagreement between you and your ex. Total costs can easily be $10,000 or more.
• Filing fee: When you file legal paperwork with the court, you'll need to pay a court filing fee of $281.