Parenting Support and Resources for Divorced or Separated Parents

If you prefer learning in a class setting, there are many parenting class options available. 

• Court-required parenting class: If you live in Oregon, most county courts require parents going through divorce, custody, or legal separation cases to take a parenting class. To find your county’s court-required parenting class, visit the Oregon Judicial Department Parent Education page.
• Community classes: If you want to meet other local parents, community classes can help you build new connections after separation. To find local classes, contact your local Oregon Parenting Education Collaborative hub.
• Online classes: There are many good online options. The Center for Divorce Education is a popular website, and many counties require parents involved in court cases to take the “Children in Between” class offered by this program. 

A trained therapist can help you heal emotionally and learn new ways to handle stress or relationship conflict. Many separated or divorced parents find support from working with a therapist. 

How do I find a therapist?  

• Psychology Today website: This site has an online directory of therapists. You can filter by state, insurance, in-person or online therapy, and more.
• Insurance companies: If you want to use your health insurance for therapy, your insurance company may have a list of in-network therapists.  

How much does therapy cost?   

Therapy is covered by many insurance plans.  

• If your health insurance covers therapy, look for in-network providers to save costs. You may pay as little as $0, or you may have a per-visit co-pay.
• If your insurance does not cover therapy, you may pay between $150 and $300 for a one-hour session. The cost depends on the provider’s experience, training, and location. 

How do I choose a therapist?   

Therapists have different specialties.

If you want a therapist for your child, look for a child and adolescent counselor. They are trained to support children navigating life changes or stresses.

If you are looking for support for yourself, look for one of these specialists: 

• Licensed Marriage & Family Therapists (LMFT): These therapists focus on relationships and family systems. They can help you adjust to changes in your family.
• Licensed Clinical Social Workers (LCSWs): They also help people manage changes in family life.
• Trauma Specialists: They can help if you have experienced abuse in your relationship and need support to process and heal. 

Parent coaching gives you one-on-one support from a parenting expert. A coach can talk with you about your goals and challenges, then help you make a plan. 

How is coaching different than therapy?  

• Coaching is usually short-term, unlike therapy. A coach may meet with you for just a few sessions instead of over a long period.
• In Oregon, anyone can call themselves a coach and offer coaching services. By contrast, therapists must complete specific training and education. 

Tip: If you want to work with a parent coach, pay attention to their training and background to make sure they are qualified. Look for professionals with formal education and experience in family therapy and child development. 

How do I find a parenting coach?  

Parent coaches may run their own businesses or work for public programs, like county behavioral health agencies or parenting education organizations. 

Here are some ways to find a coach: 

• Google: Search using keywords like “parent coach [county name, state].”
• Contact your county health program: Many counties offer parent support or coaching through their behavioral or mental health programs. 

How much does parent coaching cost?   

• Private coaches who run their own businesses usually charge between $100 and $200 per hour, depending on their experience and education.
• Coaches who work for county or state-funded programs may offer free or low-cost services. 

Books offer in-depth information on navigating divorce, high-conflict co-parenting, or supporting your child.  

Here are some book recommendations to help you begin: 

• “Mom’s House, Dad’s House: Making Two Homes for Your Child,” Isolina Ricci, Ph.D.   
• “Keeping Kids Out of the Middle: Child-Centered Parenting in the Midst of Conflict, Separation, and Divorce,” Benjamin Garber, Ph.D.
• “Overcoming the Alienation Crisis: 33 Co-Parenting Solutions,” by Shawn McCall, John A. Moran, and Matthew Sullivan.   
• “Don’t Alienate the Kids: Raising Resilient Children While Avoiding High-Conflict Divorce,” by Bill Eddy, LCSW, J.D.  

You can borrow books or audiobooks for free from your local public library. Your local library may also be able to connect you with other parenting resources.

If you have a busy schedule, podcasts are an easy way to pick up tips and strategies for this new stage of life. 

Here are some podcast recommendations to help you get started: 

• “Adventures in Co-Parenting”: A podcast from two co-parents who have navigated parenting apart, while keeping their child at the center of their decisions.
• “Co-Parent Dilemmas”: Two parenting experts answer listener questions about how to handle conflict between divorced or separated parents.   
• “It’s All Your Fault: High Conflict People”: This podcast focuses on high-conflict people and how to navigate relationships with them.   

There are many more podcasts available. Check Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to find more.